Aussie

Just arrived in Australia! Its so odd, it just doesn't feel real! I walked around melbourne all yesterday it was so beautiful and full of life! I just wanted to write a little something because i feel i have ignored my loyal fan, I am sorry. I promise I will blog more!

It's time, i guess

What better time to start re-blogging, its rainy, i am cold and doing absolutely nothing waiting for my boyfriend to arrive home, like the good housewife i have become, i have already washed and dried the dishes, with my saliva! that's my only way of retaining my self respect, its like when i was a janitor and i used to wipe the toilet paper dispensers with the rag i used to clean the toilet, ahhh that never got old, i only now feel a little bit of regret because my own sisters precious behind will sit upon my messes.

well I have been in new zealand about 5 days now, regretfully the weather has kept me in more then not, but i look forward to exploring when the sunshine comes. I did get my fair share of the country side on my 6 hour trip to napier, and yes i was quoting xena the entire time! what a woman. It makes me upset that because of her fan following the show had to take a lesbianistic turn, i mean why cant a woman be strong and intimidating without being a lesbian. no offense intended. Either way Xena rocks where were we?

The plane trip was long, mostly because my carry on felt like i was carrying a fucking dead body. I was dieing of thirst because i lacked the strength to lug my baggage over to starbucks to get a water, traveling alone only sucks cause there is no one to watch your stuff. When i first go to the airport, as one would suspect my luggage was too heavy, which is complete bullshit, the woman told me i would have to pay 50 dollars, i said fuck that and spent almost 20 minutes rearranging my things. 

On my 12 hour flight from LA rows 35 and past had broken screen monitors, Guess what row i was in, two away from those that were working. I still had a pretty good view of people in front of me happily watching their programs. I was so pathetic, almost 20 min before takeoff i sat there with the list of movies planning my conquests, i mean lets be serious i was going to watch at least 5 or 6 B list movies! I didn't get as upset as i thought i would, i think i was just too excited to be in new zealand and nervous. But  I washed the little anger i had away with the free wine. It went straight to my head, i blame the altitude!

I also slept and farted most the way. i am still unsure whether anyone heard me. I was in a very strange half sleep half awake state and i don't know if i was just so delusional thinking no one could hear me or if that was the truth, needless to say i was very paranoid about any looks after we landed. I went through customs pretty well even after i admitted to bringing at least 5 pounds of my left over trick or treating halloween candy. They didn't seem concerned. The next part was easy just look for a young blonde south african with a white trash moustache, thank you movember. Needless to say he was there and now i am here!